|
Post by Patrick on Mar 3, 2009 12:11:22 GMT
The more friends you have, the more you earn, says a study. But modern life can allow little time to maintain meaningful relationships, so what's the optimum number of friends?You can't be "close" to the number of "friends" some people reckon to have. For me, it's invariably boiled down to a hard core of just two or three very close friends - which that survey goes along with; "They usually consist of an inner circle of five "core" people and an additional layer of 10, he says. That makes 15 people - some will probably be family members - who are your central group and then outside that, there's another 35 in the next circle and another 100 on the outside. And that's one person's social world."Back in college days there was anything up to 30 odd folk I could call in on or would come over to mine or to go out with. That was my best ever time socially. I've usually had quite a good relationship with work colleagues as well, though Best Beloved always has kept hers at a safe distance - having been shat on once too often by so called "work friends" in the past.
|
|
|
Post by everso on Mar 3, 2009 14:04:03 GMT
I'm at that point in my life where I seem to see more of my family than my friends.
I have three or four close girlfriends and quite a large circle of now and then friends, but we don't see them quite so much nowadays.
By the way, talking of finance, just to let you know, after purchasing premium bonds in January I bloody didn't win anything this month.
|
|
|
Post by trubble on Mar 3, 2009 14:07:29 GMT
I have won nothing either, everso. Perhaps we need to get more friends.
|
|
|
Post by everso on Mar 3, 2009 14:12:01 GMT
I have won nothing either, everso. Perhaps we need to get more friends. Damn. I was so sure I'd win that I'd worked out just what I was going to do with my million. Half to the kids, a tenner for Mr. E, and a few months on a round the world cruise.
|
|
|
Post by Patrick on Mar 3, 2009 15:51:37 GMT
Best Beloved bought £500 worth a few years ago and had two £50 the two months afterwards.
I've had my £1 since 1969 and not won diddly.
Parents have had £20,000 in and won about four a year, but nothing bigger than £100.
My Dad apparently bought £10 worth back in the '60's but having lost the numbers, or not known the details we didn't cash it in when he died. I found an address book of his that had the four certificate numbers of mine, the one bought for my brother, Mum's and his. It's such a convoluted procedure to go through to transfer or see if they've won anything - and prized aren't transferable apparently (last time I asked). That it's hardly worth checking.
Anyway - we only have the letters and digit "Certificate Holders" number and not the actual numbers of the Bonds themselves.
Just think - there could be a hulking great unclaimed prize there that we wouldn't get anyway so might as well just do a wolf and grapes thing.
|
|
|
Post by sesley on Mar 3, 2009 15:54:27 GMT
I never play the lottery i watch people put lottery tickets on the credit card, i do wonder if they ever win,on Saturday they were announcing the lottery was 7. something million and its nice to sit and dream what you would do with that money for a while ,but i don't buy tickets so i will never know. I never win raffles or at fun bingo either. But i am a healthy fit 50 year old with loverly grown up boys who are healthy and fit and a Oh retired but well enough to be good company. and we have our own nice house in a nice part ot Scotland and so we are very rich anyway ,so there you are.
|
|
|
Post by Patrick on Mar 3, 2009 16:03:48 GMT
I never play the lottery i watch people put lottery tickets on the credit card, i do wonder if they ever win,on Saturday they were announcing the lottery was 7. something million andjavascript:void(0) its nice to sit and dream what you would do with that money for a while ,but i don't buy tickets so i will never know. I never win raffles or at fun bingo either. But i am a healthy fit 50 year old with loverly grown up boys who are healthy and fit and a Oh retired but well enough to be good company. and we have our own nice house in a nice part ot Scotland and so we are very rich anyway ,so there you are. The perfect philosophy to have. As for me - and I don't mean money here - but I always have the feeling that there's something missing.
|
|
|
Post by Flatypus on Mar 3, 2009 16:19:08 GMT
I agree with this but I think something else is really going on here. Big earners like to feel successful in all respects. So they are more likely to include as many acquaintances as possible among their friends. Often they are more dedicated to their work than to people, so to them 'friend' means something much vaguer than to the other extreme where it may mean somebody close enough to appreciate personal problems and share mutual support in matters that the well-paid would never dream of admitting to most they call 'friends' even if they experienced them.
|
|
|
Post by Patrick on Mar 3, 2009 16:23:15 GMT
Ah! "The Acquaintance!" It's not a word that's used as much as it used to be.
There's a classic photo or painting entitled "The Loneliest Man In the World" or something, I'm sure, that pictures one man standing amongst an enormous crowd of people. Possibly at a party where everyone looks like they're having a great time.
Then again - I might have made it up in my head.
Definitely rings a bell though.
|
|
stephan
Lovely, Happy & Gorgeous!
Posts: 278
|
Post by stephan on Mar 3, 2009 17:31:58 GMT
I can`t say I have many true friends-but I do see a couple now and again and it`s like yesterday. I have known Dave since I was 4,introduced him to his now wife and was there for him when at just 18 he told me Joyce was pregnant. I`m Godfather to their second child. The years never dimmed our friendship and they now have 15 grandchildren. All say `aaahhhh`
|
|
|
Post by trubble on Mar 3, 2009 17:55:00 GMT
Aaaaahhh.
|
|
|
Post by Flatypus on Mar 3, 2009 18:32:03 GMT
Ah! "The Acquaintance!" It's not a word that's used as much as it used to be. It's a word I much prefer to Friend because if everybody one is merely friendly with counts as a friend then what word remains for friends one would trust with one's life and all intimacies?
|
|
|
Post by trubble on Mar 3, 2009 20:25:32 GMT
Freinds? What Freinds? I see no Friends here? FRIENDS I have aplenty though! and it was bloomin hard work too! (Now, anyway)
|
|
|
Post by everso on Mar 4, 2009 0:27:33 GMT
I never play the lottery i watch people put lottery tickets on the credit card, i do wonder if they ever win,on Saturday they were announcing the lottery was 7. something million and its nice to sit and dream what you would do with that money for a while ,but i don't buy tickets so i will never know. I never win raffles or at fun bingo either. But i am a healthy fit 50 year old with loverly grown up boys who are healthy and fit and a Oh retired but well enough to be good company. and we have our own nice house in a nice part ot Scotland and so we are very rich anyway ,so there you are. Sesley, you are so right.
|
|
|
Post by gIant on Mar 4, 2009 19:39:10 GMT
Personally, I have never had many friends (aaah). However, those I have are long term friends. We may not keep in touch all the time, but you know at some point they will pop up again, and are always there for you and you for them.
That is what really counts.
|
|
|
Post by trubble on Mar 4, 2009 19:51:06 GMT
Very true.
My best friends are the ones with whom I know I can just take up where I left off even after a long period.
|
|
|
Post by betty on Mar 4, 2009 20:59:45 GMT
friends are the ones with whom I know I can just take up where I left off even after a long period. yes - even after decades - they know you - you laugh at the same things - which is always good
|
|
|
Post by Alpha Hooligan on Mar 5, 2009 9:36:48 GMT
I'm in the "small circle of true buds" camp. I can go without seeing my good mates for years, but when we hook up again, we just pick up where we left off. Edit: Reading all the other replies, it seems I am not alone in this...we all have some proper great mates. AH
|
|