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Post by trubble on Oct 26, 2011 17:13:21 GMT
...not to laugh.
A thread just for me and Everso.
No Riff Raff.
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Post by trubble on Oct 26, 2011 17:13:52 GMT
Victoria Wood - the swimming documentary
Acorn Antiques
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Post by bonbonlarue on Oct 26, 2011 18:38:34 GMT
ME TOO!!!!!
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Post by Weyland on Oct 26, 2011 19:18:14 GMT
******** WARNING: NAIL JOKE ********A rabbit came into a shop and asked, "Got any carrots?" The shopkeeper answered, "No!" The next day the rabbit came again and asked, "Got any carrots?" "No!" Next day the rabbit came and asked, "Got any carrots?" "No! And if you come here again and ask for carrots, I'll nail you to the wall by your ears!" Early next morning the rabbit came back and asked, "Got any nails?" "No!" "Got any carrots?"
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Post by housesparrow on Oct 26, 2011 20:04:33 GMT
The owner of a music shop was astonished when a mouse ran up onto the counter and squeaked :
"Please sir, do you have a mouse organ?"
"Bless my soul" said the shop-keeper. "You're the second little mouse I've had in here today asking for one of those."
"Oh" said the mouse. "That would have been our Monica."
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Post by Weyland on Oct 26, 2011 20:07:23 GMT
The owner of a music shop was astonished when a mouse ran up onto the counter and squeaked : "Please sir, do you have a mouse organ?" "Bless my soul" said the shop-keeper. "You're the second little mouse I've had in here today asking for one of those." "Oh" said the mouse. "That would have been our Monica." Nice to see you, Sparra. Welcome to the Riff-Raff Club. |
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Post by bonbonlarue on Oct 26, 2011 20:52:35 GMT
That Black Beauty
..bit of a dark horse..
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Post by trubble on Oct 26, 2011 23:10:48 GMT
 's all round.  Ok, ok. You're all in. 
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Post by Weyland on Oct 27, 2011 9:55:10 GMT
Come back, Chic. We need you . . .
My father was a very generous man. He came from Aberdeen.
See this watch -- he sold it to me on his deathbed.
I paid by cheque.
-- Chic Murray
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Post by trubble on Oct 27, 2011 17:16:51 GMT
That could have been a line in a Marx Brothers film.
"There's only one answer to an audience. If they don't laugh, take it out and try another one. If it gets a laugh, leave it in. If you keep talking long enough, you say something funny." - Groucho.
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Post by Alpha Hooligan on Oct 28, 2011 13:10:03 GMT
AH
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Post by tarzanontarmazepam on Oct 29, 2011 20:09:15 GMT
Jesus Christ approached St Peter
"I wish to speak with my father." he told him.
" Who are you?" asked St Peter
"I was raised by a carpenter and his wife, I was then later nailed to two pieces of wood...need I go on?"
St Peter replied ..." No, not at all, I know just who you are. I will fetch your father."
A little old grey haired man then appeared.
Jesus knelt before the man and said " Father?"
The old man replied " Pinocchio?"
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Post by everso on Oct 30, 2011 0:43:13 GMT
...not to laugh. A thread just for me and Everso. No Riff Raff. I am looking forward to "Life's Too Short". Who was it who said "Life's too short to stuff a mushroom"? (Can't be arsed to google) |
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Post by bonbonlarue on Oct 30, 2011 17:04:23 GMT
Shirley Conran...and she was sooooo right...
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Post by Weyland on Oct 30, 2011 17:17:08 GMT
Shirley Conran...and she was sooooo right...  I did so want it to be Fanny Craddock. Or St Delia. |
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Post by everso on Oct 30, 2011 18:03:21 GMT
I don't think I've ever stuffed a mushroom.  |
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Post by bonbonlarue on Oct 30, 2011 18:16:45 GMT
Thought of you Ev at the weekend...our room had a lovely chaise... couldn't resist posing for a pic...  |
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Post by everso on Oct 30, 2011 23:54:40 GMT
Thought of you Ev at the weekend...our room had a lovely chaise... couldn't resist posing for a pic... There's nothing quite like a chaise longue. |
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Post by motorist on Oct 31, 2011 18:13:34 GMT
I don't think I've ever stuffed a mushroom. Dress up like one, and Hooly can show you how to do it  |
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Post by Weyland on Oct 31, 2011 18:29:36 GMT
I don't think I've ever stuffed a mushroom. Dress up like one, and Hooly can show you how to do it  |
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A.P.P.S
S C 
)